Hearing You, Seeing You
by VyxenSkye
Summary: EDITED! Kenji was born blind and deaf, but no one knows this. How you ask? Kenshin traded with an unknown deity at his birth to give his son back his sight and hearing. The price? Kenshin's own, slowly over time.
1. The Beginning

Hearing You, Seeing You

By: Hitokiri Musei

Rated: T

Summary: Kenji was born blind and deaf, but no one knows this. How you ask? Kenshin traded with an unknown deity at his birth to give his son back his sight and hearing. The price? Kenshin's own, slowly over time.

I don't own Rurouni Kenshin –cries- But I can still get stories out of his sexy redhead self! –grins- Read and review please!

Part 1

The Beginning

(Kenshin)

The cry of a baby was like music to my ears, and a wide smile spread across my face. Megumi cut the cord connecting the child to my wife with a smile. "Congratulations Ken-san. You have a son."

My smile grew and I squeezed Kaoru's sweaty hand as she shed tears of joy. I dropped a kiss on her lips. "You did so well koishii…"

She smiled, looking to Megumi as the woman wrapped our child in a blanket. "Our little Kenji."

I nodded. We had prepared names earlier, so we had been ready to name the child as soon as he had been born. I looked up as Megumi gasped, moving to her side. "Megumi-dono?"

She was holding Kenji with shaking hands. "Ken-san, look at his eyes."

I looked at Kenji, and then my joy simply disappeared. A white film covered Kenji's blue-violet eyes. My son was blind.

Megumi quickly began to perform a check over Kenji, and again I was rewarded with a gasp. "Oh Kami, he's deaf as well."

I took Kenji from her, tears of sorrow sliding down my cheeks. "Oh Kami, please no, don't let this be true." I held Kenji to my chest, pleading in my mind that it wasn't true, that somehow this was all just a horrible nightmare.

_Why do you cry Himura Kenshin? It is not like you to shed tears. _

I looked up in shock to find everything around me had frozen. Only Kenji and I moved, my son's little fists clenching in my gi. "Who are you?" I whispered, looking around.

_You need not know. What is it that you want Himura Kenshin?_

I looked down at Kenji. "For my son to have a normal life. Without the trials of being blind or deaf." I looked up again. "But why are you doing this for me?"

_Oh, no reason. I'm just bored really. Very well. Payment with be taken over time as I see fit._

I looked down and I saw Kenji's eyes clear. "Kenji?" I murmured. He turned his eyes to my face, looking at me with big eyes. The smile returned to my face, and everything began to move again.

Megumi's sad look instantly became a smile. "Well Ken-san, are you going to let Kaoru see her baby?"

I nodded slowly. 'I'm the only one who knows…' I thought in wonder.

I went to Kaoru, and she took Kenji with a smile. "He looks so much like you Kenshin," she murmured, looking up at me.

I nodded, smiling back at her. "Hai. But he has your eyes koishii." I watched as she cuddled our infant son, joy again filling me. 'It is better this way…'

* * *

(3 years later)

I was playing with Kenji when my head began to pound. I rubbed my temples slightly, and then the pain subsided.

Kenji's tiny hands on my leg brought me back to reality. "Daddy!" he said happily.

I began to tickle him, watching as he squealed and tried to wiggle away. His limited vocabulary unfortunately included the one thing that would bring Kaoru running. "MOOOMMMMYYY!"

Kaoru came shooting out of the dojo, ready to protect her child. She spotted me, and then grinned. "I'll save you Kenji!"

I put up my hands. "Oh no!" I snatched up a madly giggling Kenji, pretending to kidnap him. "You'll never get him from me!"

Kaoru ran after me as I darted around the yard, using my speed to make the breeze blow Kenji's red hair around his face. He squealed in joy, clenching his tiny hands in my gi.

I began to slow as I always did, allowing Kaoru to gain ground on me. "Oh no! She's going to catch me!"

Kenji wiggled again. "Get me Mommy!" he cried, waving his arms. He was quite intelligent for a 3 year old, learning quickly by mimicking Kaoru and I.

Kaoru pulled out her bokken from nowhere, and then bopped me on the head lightly. I carefully fell, rolling and avoiding pain for both Kenji and I.

Kaoru lifted Kenji from my still body, hugging him close to her. "Oh my precious Kenji, I'm so glad you're okay!"

He hugged her neck. "Mommy saved me!" He suddenly wiggled in her arms. "Daddy okay?"

Kaoru set him down and he ran to me. But I was struggling to breathe as a weight pushed on my chest, forcing me into blackness.

* * *

(Kaoru)

Kenji ran to Kenshin like always, patting his face and cheeks. "Daddy, wake up! No sleeping!"

I narrowed my eyes. "Kenshin?"

He did not move, remaining still on the ground. Kenji looked up at me with large eyes. "Mommy, Daddy's all warm!"

I frowned, rushing forward to kneel beside my husband and rolling him onto his back. "Oh Kami…" Kenshin was deathly pale and sweating, cheeks flushed bright red. Each breath was a struggle for him. "Yahiko!" I screamed.

The boy came running out, and then gasped when he saw Kenshin unconscious on the ground. "I'll get Megumi!" he said instantly, running from the yard.

I pulled Kenshin's head into my lap, stroking his already damp bangs. "Oh Kenshin, what's happening to you?" I murmured.

Kenji crawled forward to sit beside Kenshin's heaving chest, a small hand patting his father's. "Why Daddy sick?"

I sighed. "I don't know Kenji. Aunt Meg will help Daddy."

He nodded. "Auntie Meg good helper."

I couldn't help smiling. "Hai."

Kenshin's breath hitched and I looked down at him. "Anata?"

He blinked at me. "Kaoru?" He blinked again, bringing up the hand not held by Kenji to rub at his eyes.

I frowned. "What's wrong Kenshin?"

He shook his head. "Nothing koshii. Just a bit disoriented."

I frowned again. "Kenshin…"

He shook his head with a smile. "I'm fine Kaoru."

I put a hand on his forehead. "You're still pretty warm Kenshin, you should lay down." He started to protest and I shook my head firmly. "Now."

Kenji started tugging him towards the dojo. "Come Daddy! Gotta go to bed!"

Kenshin blinked at him, and then nodded. "Okay Kenji."

I followed them inside, watching Kenshin closely. He showed no sign of weakness, and I started to relax. Maybe he really was alright. But I couldn't shake off the feeling that something was wrong.

* * *

(Kenshin)

Oh Kami, what was going on? My sight was blurry, I had trouble seeing clearly. I followed the small red, flesh, and blue colored blur that was Kenji as he led me to the dojo.

"Daddy, got's to sleep and get better!" he said as he pulled me along, tugging on my pointer finger, which he had a hold of.

I followed him silently, still trying to clear my head. The brief moment had left, taking some of my sight with it. 'Is this my punishment?' I wondered. 'My payment?'


	2. Homecomings and Pain

Chapter 2

Homecomings and Pain

(Kenshin)

My sight remained blurry, but it didn't get any worse. It stayed steady, turning everything around me into a fuzzy blur that I soon grew used to. Kaoru didn't notice, much to my relief.

My fever had left fairly quickly, and Megumi had declared me healthy only a week after my fall. Kenji, observant child that he is, wouldn't let me play that game with him for nearly another week. "No more warm!" he would say firmly.

I watched my son grow with loving eyes, and not long after his sixth birthday we got a visit from Sano, who had left a while ago to travel. It was a day that none of us were bound to forget.

I was just finishing the laundry when Kenji came running up to me. "Daddy! Daddy!"

I looked up as he skidded to a stop in front of me. "What is it Kenji?"

He tugged lightly on my sleeve. "There's a big man at the gate Daddy!"

I blinked; dropping the gi I was currently washing and standing. "Really now Kenji." I murmured. I picked him up, swinging him up into his favorite position, on my shoulders. He was small for a six-year-old, and I could easily carry him like that.

I felt his hands patting my hair. "Hai Daddy. He's really tall."

I walked to the gate, confusion flitting into my mind. Who could it possibly be? I spotted the man Kenji was talking about standing just outside the gate. I couldn't tell much about him with my limited sight, but he had long brown hair, a kind smile, and what looked like a short beard. "Can I help you?" I asked pleasantly.

The man laughed. "Do I really look that different Kenshin?"

It was the voice that got me, and my eyes widened. "Sanosuke?" I found myself in a tight hug, and I heard Kenji squeal in protest. "Sanosuke, you're back!"

He released me, grinning widely. "Hai, I am." His gaze traveled to Kenji. "Well who's this little guy?"

I smiled, tickling Kenji's foot. Sano had left before Kaoru's pregnancy, so he had no idea that we now had a son. Kenji's feet kicked against my chest and his hands patted my hair. "This is my son, Kenji."

"Oh really," Sano said jokingly. "He looks just like you Kenshin." He put out a hand to Kenji. "Hello Kenji. I'm your uncle Sano."

Kenji giggled, wrapping both of his hands around Sano's much larger one. "Hiya!"

Sano grinned. "So how old are you Kenji?"

"I'm six!" Kenji said, proudly brandishing six little fingers.

Sano laughed. "Smart kid Kenshin. So where's Jou-chan?"

I turned. "Why don't you come share some lunch with us? Kaoru's just finished cooking."

He hesitated. "Jou-chan's cooking?"

That brought a laugh from me. "She's gotten much better Sano. I've been teaching her. However, there are still some things to improve on."

Sano fell into step beside me. "If that's the case, I think I'll risk it. I'm starving!"

Kenji tugged on my bangs gently. "Put me down Daddy!" I lifted him from my shoulders and set him gently on the ground. He took off at a run for the dojo. "Mommy! Mommy!"

Sano chuckled. "He sure is a hyper kid. Reminds me a lot of Jou-chan." He breathed deep of the air. "I've missed this place."

"We've missed you Sano." I murmured.

Kaoru came out at that moment, being pulled by Kenji's hold on her fingers. She recognized Sano instantly. "Sano! You're back!"

Sano grinned. "Sure am. So what's to eat, I'm starved!"

She laughed. "Always thinking about your stomach. Well, come on in, we're just about to eat." She walked to me, kissing my scarred cheek gently. "I think I've got it right this time."

We sat down to warm rice balls, steaming fish, and tofu. Sano licked his lips, sitting and dishing up. He took a bite of his rice ball, and then grinned. "This is pretty good Jou-chan, you are getting better!"

Kaoru blushed faintly. "Arigatou Sano."

We ate in silence, Kenji sitting in between Kaoru and I. I tasted the fish slowly. "Better Kaoru, but a bit less spices."

She nodded. "Alright." She wiped Kenji's face clean as he finished, and then continued her own meal.

I set my chopsticks down and placed my hands in my lap, looking to Sano. "So why did you come back Sano?"  
He grinned. "Got tired of being away for so long."

We continued to talk, and I was suddenly interrupted as Kenji climbed into my lap, snuggling close to my stomach. I smile, patting his hair. "Are you tired Kenji?"

He yawned in response, closing his eyes. He had been up late the night before because of a nightmare, and none of us had gotten much sleep. Kaoru smiled. "Why don't you go put him in his futon for a little while? It couldn't hurt."

I nodded, lifting Kenji from my lap and walking towards his room. "I'll be right back."

I settled Kenji in his futon, covering him with a light blanket. He was already dozing snuggling into his soft futon. I kissed his forehead gently. "Sleep well Kenji. I love you aisoku(beloved son)."

"Love you…Daddy…" he murmured back, rolling over in his blankets.

I smiled, standing and walking to the door. I slid the shoji shut, and then put my forehead against the wooden frame. The floor beneath my feet was tilting, threatening to dump me off my feet. I panted, trying to clear my head.

Pain suddenly shot through my skull, and I gasped, my teeth clicking together with force. Another piercing pain shot through me, and I coughed. Blood spattered the paper in front of me, dripping down the door. Blood was filling my mouth, and I realized that I'd bitten my tongue. My vision blurred further, and then the world faded as I slipped to my knees, and then to the floor.

* * *

(Kaoru)

Sano and I talked pleasantly for a few minutes, and then I got the feeling that something was wrong. "It shouldn't take this long, not with how tired Kenji was." I murmured, standing.

Sano followed me slowly. "You're right Jou-chan."

We walked into the hall, and I saw the pale hand lying limply near us. I screamed, running forward. "Kenshin!"

I rolled his still body over, fearfully noticing the blood trailing from the corner of his mouth. I wiped it away, sweeping his red bangs away from his closed eyes. "Sano, we need to get him to Megumi."

He nodded, lifting Kenshin quickly. "Get the kid, let's go."

I nodded, going into Kenji's bedroom. I was loathing waking my peacefully sleeping son, but my worry for Kenshin overrode it. I shook his shoulder gently. "Kenji. Wake up sweetie."

He yawned, blinking sleepily at me. "Mommy?"

I picked him up, settling him on my hip. "Come on Kenji, you need to wake up okay?"

He rubbed at one eye with a hand. "Why Mommy? I was sleeping…"

I silenced him, going out to follow Sano. The taller man had wrapped Kenshin in a blanket, knowing that the sight of Kenshin like this would frighten Kenji. My husband's still body was cradled close to his chest, and I could see the tenderness in his embrace.

We walked fairly quickly through the streets, getting both curious and worried looks. Sano suddenly swore and took off at a run.

I picked up the pace with him, confused. "Sano!"

He swore again. "His breathing is acting funny, we need to hurry!"

Megumi's clinic was in front of us before I knew it, and Sano burst in yelling our friend's name.

"What the devil is all this yelling about!" Megumi called, coming out of the back room. She spotted Sano and gasped. "Sanosuke!"

"In the back kitsune, now!" Sano said, pushing her in front of him. "Go! Now!"

"Sano! What…" she was cut off as Sano accidentally jostled Kenshin and a single pale hand flopped out to hang limply from the bundle of blankets.

Megumi instantly shut her mouth, turning and rushing into the back room. I remained out front, holding Kenji silently.

Kenji had by now figured out that something was wrong, and his fingers clenched in my kimono, his eyes wide. "Mommy?"

"Shh Kenji, it's okay." I murmured absently. "It's okay…" But in the back of my mind, I heard the faint response from myself. 'I hope…'


	3. Alone In The Dark

Chapter 3

Alone in the Dark

(Kaoru)

I remained quiet, absently petting Kenji's hair as he sat in my lap. He was moving worriedly on my knees, and I could sense his discomfort.

It had been about a half an hour since Sano and Megumi had disappeared into the clinic, and I was growing more and more anxious. I looked up sharply as I heard a door open. Sano walked out, raking a hand through his brown hair.

He sat beside me, sighing heavily. "He's gonna be okay, according to Megumi. She says he's got a fever and his breathing's still a little off, but he'll be okay." He put out a hand. "I'll take Kenji, if you wanted to go see him."

I shook my head slightly, standing with Kenji balanced on my hip. "I'll take Kenji with me. I'll be back in a minute."

I walked silently into the back, my hands shaking slightly. I spotted Megumi kneeling beside a futon, where there lay the thin form of my husband. I sat beside her, watching Kenshin's pale face as he breathed.

Kenji struggled out of my arms, squirming against Kenshin's side. "Daddy?" he asked, leaning against his father's stomach. "Daddy?"

I held back tears that welled up in my eyes. "Daddy's sleeping Kenji."

He settled his head on Kenshin's chest, a place he liked to put it. He'd always loved to listen to Kenshin's heart, and I found it incredibly adorable. "Okay Mommy."

I sighed, reaching out and twisting my fingers in Kenshin's limp ones. 'Onegai, wake up soon anata…'

* * *

(Kenshin)

I struggled up out of unconsciousness slowly, but when I opened my eyes I was greeted by darkness. I blinked, but it remained the same. "K-Kaoru?" I called, my voice trembling.

There was no answer, and I gulped, pushing myself into a sitting position. "K-Kaoru!"

I tried to use ki, but found to my horror that I couldn't. I was alone in the dark, with no way to tell where I was, who was there, and who wasn't. I began to panic. "Kaoru!

I forced myself into a standing position, stretching my hands out in front of me. "KAORU!"

* * *

(Megumi)

I was awoken by a cry. I sat bolt upright in my futon, listening. I heard the cry again and I recognized the voice of Ken-san, calling for Kaoru. I stood tightening my sash and leaving the room. 'Why does he sound so panicked?' I thought.

I found Ken-san in his room, huddled in a ball on his futon. I knelt by him, reaching out to touch his shoulder. He cried out and leapt away from me.

"Ken-san?" I asked loudly.

He blinked. "M-Megumi-dono?" He put out a hand. "Where are you?"

I stood, getting a lantern and lighting it. I spotted Ken-san's futon, messed up, the blankets hanging off it. "Ken-san, are you alright?"

His head turned in my direction. "Megumi-dono, where are you?"

I blinked. "I'm right here Ken-san."

His hand stretched out in my direction, and he crawled forward. "I cannot see you Megumi-dono, you have to direct me."

This hit me like a slap in the face. "N-nani?" I shakily put out my hand, touching his. He wrapped his calloused fingers around mine, moving forward cautiously. "Please look at me Ken-san." He turned his face to me, and I saw that his eyes were covered with a hazy white film. "Oh Kami…"

He sighed, his fingers lifting to seek my face. I allowed him to do so silently. He frowned. "Don't cry Megumi-dono. Let me explain."

I blinked; I hadn't realized that I was crying. "You know why you're blind Ken-san?"

He nodded. "It will be difficult to understand, but please know, everything I say is true." I nodded, knowing that he would feel it though the hand on my cheek. He settled down beside me, his hand traveling down to grip my own, and then began. "When Kenji was born, he was blind and deaf. I bargained with a deity I didn't know so he wouldn't have to live with those disabilities. Unfortunately, the payment is my own sight and hearing."

My mouth was gaping open. "Demo, I delivered Kenji myself! That child was perfectly healthy!"

"Iie Megumi-dono, you only believe that. Your memories were altered. I am the only one that can clearly remember that night," he said softly. "That past year when I got sick, it took a little of my sight with it. I can still see light, so it is not completely gone," he murmured, looking down.

"So every three years…" I murmured, calculating in my head the years of Kenji's life to when Ken-san had gotten sick.

"Hai. By the time Kenji is nine I will be completely blind, and when he is 18 completely deaf. At least, this is what I believe." His voice was extremely quiet.

"Oh Ken-san…" I whispered. "I'm so sorry."

He shook his head. "Don't be Megumi-dono. I would willingly give my life for my son, do not let this sorrow you."

I sighed, and then finally noticed how warm and clammy his hand was. "You should be resting Ken-san, you still have a fever!"

He nodded. "Alright." He lay down slowly, closing his glazed eyes. "Arigatou for listening Megumi-dono."

I smiled, placing a wet cloth on his forehead. "It's no trouble at all Ken-san. Now please, _rest_, and get up your strength again." I stood. "I'll be back in a moment."

It was only when I'd left the room that I allowed myself to weep for him.

* * *

Unfortunately Ken-san was wrong. The next morning I checked his eyes in the light, and his sight had completely vanished. He now lived in a world of black. His prediction of being fully deaf and blind by Kenji's 18th birthday dwindled to his 15th. I could see the fear and sorrow etched in every aspect of Ken-san's body, even though he pretended he was fine, if only for my sake.

I sighed, watching as he drank his medicine. "Kaoru said that she and Kenji are coming to visit sometime today."

A faint smile came to his face. "Are they now? Did she say when?"

"Iie." I took the empty teacup from him as he held it in my direction. "She only said that she would come. But knowing her, it will be fairly soon."

"Probably as soon as Kenji wakes," he murmured, lying back down with a yawn. "You didn't slip a drug into that tea, did you Megumi-dono?"

I chuckled. "Iie Ken-san, although I was considering it. You need the rest. But this medicine makes people drowsy on its own."

He closed his eyes, sinking into the futon limply as the medicine began to take effect. I sighed once I was sure he was asleep, replacing the cold cloth on his forehead. He still had a fever, but it was fading. I knew for a fact that he hadn't slept since waking sometime ago, and he needed that precious sleep if he was to get well.

There was suddenly the sound of the front door opening and I stood, going to the main room. Kaoru stood there, Kenji holding her right hand and looking around with big eyes.

I smiled. "Ohayou Kaoru. I'm afraid Ken-san's only just fallen asleep, and as you know, he needs his rest."

She nodded. "It's okay Megumi. I just want to sit with him, so we'll be the first people he sees when he wakes up."

I winced inwardly, but I decided to send Kenji away. I would let his parents tell him the news. I knelt, getting down to his level. "Kenji, why don't you go see Daddy?" He nodded, releasing Kaoru's hand. I put a finger to my lips. "But you need to be quiet okay? He's sleeping."

He nodded, his simple child's logic understanding instantly. "Okay Aunt Meg." He opened the door he knew Ken-san was behind, tiptoeing in.

I smiled, but it faded when I looked to Kaoru. Her face was full of fear, and her hands were clenched in her kimono sleeves. "Megumi?"  
I sighed. "Sit Kaoru. This is very big news." She did so, chewing on her lip. I looked down. "Ken-san is going to be okay, but this strange illness has permanently damaged him." Kaoru was staring at me with wide teary eyes, her mouth slightly open. I glanced towards Ken-san's room, tears welling up in my own eyes. "Ken-san is blind Kaoru."

Her tears fell, and she shook her head. "Oh no…Onegai, don't let that be true."

"Gomen Kaoru, but I can't do anything." I stood, putting out a hand to her. "Come on, you'd better go sit in there. I'll let you and Ken-san tell Kenji."

She dried her tears, trying to remain collected for Kenji's sake. We walked inside, but I stopped. "I'll let you be alone." I hugged the younger woman tightly. "It'll be alright." I whispered. "You must trust in Ken-san." And with that, I left.

* * *

(Kaoru)

It was taking everything I had not to cry in front of Kenji, but I remained calm. The sight I first saw nearly broke my dam, and I choked on the built up tears.

Kenji was lying snuggled up to Kenshin's stomach, his head on his father's chest and one hand tangled in Kenshin's loose crimson hair. He was fast asleep.

I knew that if I cried it would wake Kenji. He was always so attuned to both my and Kenshin's emotions. I sighed, tangling my fingers in Kenshin's.

It had been only about 15 minutes when Kenshin began to stir. This woke Kenji, and he looked up at Kenshin with big eyes.

Kenshin opened his violet eyes, and I nearly choked again. Those beautiful lavender irises were clouded over with white, unseeing. He raised his free hand, his fingers gliding up Kenji's back to touch his hair. "Kenji…" he murmured.

Kenji moved back as Kenshin sat up, grinning up at his father. "Ohayou Daddy!"

I felt Kenshin squeeze my hand. "Ohayou Kenji."

I leaned forward, gently touching Kenshin's cheek. "Ohayou anata." I guided his lips to mine, and he smiled sadly at me.

Kenji reached up, his little fingers touching Kenshin's face. My husband had not noticed his movement, and the light touch startled him. He jumped slightly, and then relaxed. "Kenji."

Kenji, however, was confused. "Daddy? Why'd I scare you?"

Kenshin sighed, his blank eyes filling with sadness. "Kenji, Daddy couldn't see you move." Kenji still seemed confused, and then Kenshin spoke again. "Daddy can't see anything anymore."

Kenji blinked. "Daddy can't see?"

Kenshin shook his head. "Iie, I cannot."

Kenji clambered into his lap, patting his face with little hands. He peered at Kenshin, staring into his father's glazed eyes. "Daddy's eyes changed colors," he murmured. He suddenly looked at me. "Daddy will be alright Mommy. I'll take care of him!" he declared to me proudly. "It won't be hard for him!"

I smiled, but it changed to shock as Kenshin gathered Kenji into his arms, settling his chin on Kenji's shoulder. A single tear slid down his cheek. "Oh aisoku…" he murmured. "I love you so much…"

Kenji wrapped his arms around his father's neck hesitantly. "I-I love you too Daddy." He put his cheek against Kenshin's, and I sniffled, trying to keep the tears in.

'We'll be alright," I thought doggedly. 'Kenshin can do this. We all can.'


	4. Help Me With This Pain

Chapter 4

Help Me With This Pain

(Kenshin)

I began to grow used to the darkness of my world, and I found that my other senses began to grow stronger. I could easily find my way around the dojo on my own, and I soon knew our property as well as I did the hilt of my own sakabatou.

Kenji almost never left my side in those first few weeks, and my relationship with him continued to strengthen. We became closer than I had ever thought possible, and I knew that Kaoru was extremely happy with it.

"I love the way you two are like two peas in a pod! Well, two redheaded peas," she would say to me.

To my surprise Kenji's ninth birthday passed with no trouble, there were no more attacks. 'Am I finally free? Does it believe that I've done well?' I thought once, but I knew in my heart that this wasn't true. Something was going to happen, and soon.

I opened my eyes that morning to the same blackness and a weight on my chest. I heard Kenji's voice an instant later. "Come on Dad, get up! You've been sleeping forever!"

I yawned, sitting up and knocking him away from me. "What time is it Kenji?"

"Nine."

I blinked. "And that's forever?"

I felt his movement as he nodded fiercely. "Well yea!" His knuckles tapped my forehead. "It's my birthday today Dad!"

I grinned. "I know Kenji. I couldn't forget that."

He snorted. "You'd better not. I'm turning twelve today!"

I stood, tightening my yukata's sash. "Wow, a whole twelve years old. You're almost a man."

Again he snorted. "Well that's silly Dad. I've always been a man!"

I put a hand on his head, which was about even with my shoulders. Kenji, like myself, was never going to be a big man, but he was growing a little faster than I had. Already he was nearly the height I had been when I had joined the Ishin Shishi, even though he was only twelve.

"Hai, that you have Kenji." I murmured. "No why don't you go out so I can get dressed?"

"Alright Dad. You'd better not go back to sleep," he said as he opened the shoji door.

I chuckled. "I'm not that old Kenji, I'm not going to go back to sleep." I waited until the door had shut and then I got my gi and a clean hakama. I didn't worry about colors; Kaoru always set out clothes for me, or helped me. I tied my obi and left the room, going to where I smelled breakfast being cooked.

"Kaoru?" I said softly.

"Kenshin, you're awake."

She touched my hand, and then her lips met my scarred cheek in a gentle kiss. I chuckled. "Only because Kenji decided I'd slept 'forever.'" I sniffed the air. "Miso?"

I could hear the smile in her voice. "Hai. We're nearly out of supplies, so we'll need to go shopping soon."

"I'll go today with Kenji. You can use that time…"

I was interrupted as I heard Kenji's running footsteps and I easily sidestepped his tackle. He hit the floor with a thump. "Oh man! That wasn't fair Dad!"

I laughed, extending a hand in his direction, which he took to stand. "It was perfectly fair. Payback for you waking me up."

Kaoru's happy laugh filled my ears. "Why don't you two bakas go sit down and get ready to eat. Breakfast is almost ready."

Kenji and I went into the other room, settling in our spots. "Kenji, would you like to come with me to the market today?"

I smiled as my son sighed. "Come on Dad, do I have to? It's my birthday!"

"It may be an opportune time for your mother to get your presents ready." I hinted. I knew that Kaoru wanted to finish up with Kenji's presents, and if Kenji went with me it would give her the time.

"Really?" This time there was appeal in his voice. "Alright Dad, I'll go."

I smiled. "Arigatou Kenji."

* * *

'No. No. Any day but today. Please, not today.' I pleaded feverently with my body. Another attack was coming, and it was coming on fast. My head was pounding, sweat trickling down my skin, and I knew my cheeks were flushed.

I followed Kenji as he kept up a steady strain of speaking, excitedly talking about his birthday. "I'll bet I'm gonna get a new bokken. Mine's getting old!" He laughed. "With how much Mom's been working with me it's not surprising!"

I smiled in order to reassure him if he was worried. I couldn't hear that emotion in his voice, but when he wanted too, Kenji was good at hiding his emotions, just like me. "Maybe Kenji."

We continued on, and Kenji's voice began to fade in my ears. Pain filled me, and I struggled to remain standing. 'Kuso…It's getting harder to breathe…'

I stumbled, a few of the groceries slipping from my grip. I was driven to my knees as pain filled me again. Coughs wracked me as I tried to draw breath into unwilling lungs.

Kenji's terrified voice echoed my ears. "Dad? Dad! Dad, answer me! What's going on?"

My chest was burning, my body afire with pain. The pain finally drove me under, and then I knew no more.

* * *

(Kenji)

I watched in horror as my father collapsed onto the ground in front of me. I ran to his side, noting his flushed cheeks, sweaty face, and shallow, wheezing breath. It was just like last time, when he'd gotten sick a little bit after my sixth birthday.

I shook him worriedly. "Dad, please, wake up!" There was no response from him, and I frowned, trying to think of what to do. I could run and get Mom or Aunt Meg, but what would happen to Dad in that time? I finally decided to try and take Dad home. We weren't that far, and I was pretty tall. Maybe I could do it.

I pulled Dad's arm up and over my shoulders, putting my arm around his chest. He was heavy, and his feet dragged, but I had to get him home!

I took a few steps, gritting my teeth as my fathers' weight bore down on me. I continued to walk, doggedly moving forward. 'I have to get him home! I have too!'

* * *

(Kaoru)

I was sweeping the porch when I heard the sound of the gate opening. I turned to greet my husband and my son, and then the broom fell from my hands. "Kenshin!"

Kenji was quite obviously struggling to hold his father upright, and I ran forward to help him. I lifted Kenshin's free arm to my own shoulders, adding my strength to Kenji's. "Kenji, what happened?"

My son didn't answer me until we got Kenshin inside and on our futon. Kenji took a moment to calm his panting, and then spoke. "We were on our way home when Dad started acting a little weird. He seemed to brush it off, so I let it go. Then he just started coughing, and then next thing I knew he was on the ground."

I sighed, standing. "This had to happen on your birthday… You need to run for Aunt Meg Kenji, and quickly." He nodded and ran from the dojo. I collected a few soft cloths and some water so I could help with Kenshin's fever.

I settled beside my husband and lay a cold cloth across his forehead. He sucked in a breath at the feeling, a small moan escaping his lips. "It's okay Kenshin, it's only me." I said comfortingly.

He turned his head towards me. "K-Kaoru…" He coughed, and then spoke again. "W-Water… please…"

I soaked another clean cloth, holding it to his mouth. I didn't have any cups, and I didn't want to leave him alone. "Suck on this Kenshin."

He drew the cloth into his mouth, weakly sucking the cool water from the fabric. He breathed for a moment, and then sighed. "Kaoru, I need to tell you something."

I blinked. "Well, I'm listening."

He turned his head, opening his eyes. "Kenji. Where is my son?"

"He went to get Megumi. He should be back soon. Is it…is it that important?" I murmured, fear flooding into my mind.

He sighed. "Hai. It is." His eyes closed and he sank back into unconsciousness, his breathing growing shallow again. I replaced the cloth that had fallen off with his movement. 'Hurry back Kenji.'

* * *

(Kenji)

Aunt Meg and I ran through the streets, me just behind her. The minute I had told her about Dad she gasped, grabbing her bag and running from the clinic. I was running as fast as I could after her.

I slid to a stop in front of the dojo, pausing to catch my breath. Aunt Meg went straight in, and, my curiosity spiked, I followed her. I found her already getting medicines ready for my father.

My mother came to my side, leaning down to whisper in my ear. "Your father says that he wants to speak with us, so I want you to stay here."

I nodded slightly, watching as Aunt Meg pulled my Dad into a sitting position. "Ken-san? Can you hear me?"

Dad nodded. "Hai. But you are very faint."

"Drink this Ken-san," she said, putting a cup to his lips. "It will help your fever, and hopefully your pain." She frowned then. "Don't you dare tell me you're not in pain either. I know you are."

He sighed. "Kaoru? Kenji?"

"We're here anata," Mom said, moving forward to hold his hand. I sat near her, feeling little worried.

"Kaoru, when Kenji was born, he was blind and deaf," my Dad said softly. I blinked. "I traded for his sight and hearing, so he wouldn't have to live with those disabilities. But the price is my own sight and hearing."

My mother was frozen in shock. "You what? But, Kenji was fine!"

"Only I can really remember that night. I'm going deaf Kaoru, and by the time Kenji is 15 I suspect I will fully lose my hearing. I will be totally blind and deaf. But, I don't care. I am glad…" Dad put out a hand, searching for me. I touched his fingers shakily, and he squeezed my hand. "You don't have to live with this Kenji."

Aunt Meg spoke up. "There's one more thing. These attacks that Ken-san has, they are greatly damaging his body. His heart is growing weaker, breathing is getting more difficult." She sighed. "I'm not sure if Ken-san will survive the next attack."

I barely felt the warm tear as it slid down my cheek. I held my fathers hand tightly, shivering. Dad drew me into his arms suddenly, pressing my face into his neck.

"It's okay Kenji. I would rather you lived freely," he whispered. "You are young, barely starting life. I am old."

I clung to him. "I love you Daddy." I could finally hold it back no longer, and I clutched at my father's clothes and cried for the first time in years.


	5. Stay With Me

Chapter 5

Stay With Me

(Kenji)

The signs of what was happening to my father grew so much now that I couldn't ignore them. I began to notice little things that he had always been able to hide from me, such as his limp. I had never seen it before, but now I noticed it all the time. According to Mom it had been there since Dad had first gone blind.

I had to call him twice often to get his attention, with his hearing depleted like it was. He didn't notice things right away like he had since he'd lost his eyesight, and I had to make sure that I called his name before I touched him at all. I had made the mistake one time of forgetting, and I had found my wrist in a crushing grip and my father's amber tinted eyes glaring in my direction.

More things came out as the years passed. On the day of my fourteenth birthday I noticed that Dad hadn't eaten at all. I offered him some food, but he refused with a smile, saying that he wasn't feeling too well.

That had confused me. In all the time I could remember, Dad had never been sick. He had never said those words to me; I had never seen him sick at all. Why would it be starting now? Was it what Aunt Meg had said? Was my father really going to leave us?

It wasn't until I caught Mom and Dad having a late night talk that I realized the severity of what was going on. I had known all along that Dad was getting steadily worse, but this really opened my eyes. I was supposed to be in bed, but I hadn't been able to sleep, and then I had heard their voices. I went to hide behind the wall, listening carefully.

"Kenshin, you need to go talk to Megumi, please! I'm so worried about you!" That was my mother's voice, sounding full of fear and worry.

I heard my father sigh. "Kaoru, Megumi-dono has told me many times that there's nothing she can do. You know this."

"Kenshin, please. There has to be something she can do! You don't eat, you barely sleep, and you're in pain often, something's not right!"

I heard Dad begin to speak, but his voice was cut off in a choking sound, and I heard his running footsteps as he sped for the bathroom, probably to throw up.

I couldn't listen anymore. I stole away from the place, running into my room and huddling on my futon. I held my blankets tight around me, closing my eyes slightly. 'Please, Kami-sama. If you can hear me, don't take my Dad from us. We need him. Please…'

* * *

"Kenji! Kenji, will you come here for a moment!"

I heard Dad calling for me, and I ran to his side. "Yea Dad, what is it?"

He smiled in my general direction, and then gestured towards the laundry basket sitting near him. "Would you please take this inside for me?"

I blinked, but lifted the basket and followed him as he felt his way along the wall. Yes, felt. Dad could no longer use sound and other things to estimate where he was in the house; he had to feel along the walls in order to stay away from them. Once he knew where he was he was relatively accurate with his predictions, but he still held his fingers against the wall for comfort.

I set the basket where he indicated, observing his limp with worried eyes. It was getting worse, and quickly. I knew that my father had asked me to carry the basket for more than just the reason of his blindness. His hands were bandaged, and both were curled in his gi, trying to hide from the pain that touching things brought. My mother had explained that there were sores on his hands, and that it was painful for him to touch anything.

I sighed slightly. "Dad…" I touched his shoulder, and he looked towards me with glazed violet eyes. "Are you alright?"

He smiled. "Hai, of course I am Kenji."

I frowned. "No, you're not." His smile fell at these words. "I know that you're not Dad, don't lie to me. I'm not little anymore. I know something's wrong with you, even if nobody will tell me what it is."

He sighed then, looking away from me. "You're so perceptive Kenji; sometimes I wish you weren't so smart." His bandaged fingers closed softly around mine, just enough to lead me, but not cause himself pain. "Come with me Kenji, I need help changing the bandages on my hands, and we need to talk."

I followed him silently. I wasn't sure what there was to talk about, I already knew about that deity that he had made a bargain with, I knew that he would probably go deaf on my 15th birthday, which was two months away. I knew that his body was weak, that the attacks were wearing him down. What more could there be?

My father led me to his room, sitting down near his and mother's folded futon and leaning tiredly against it. I got bandages and then sat beside him, worry on my face. "Dad?"

He smiled slightly. "I'm alright Kenji, I'm only tired." His face fell into seriousness as I held his bandaged hands gently in mine.

I unwrapped his wraps, exposing the red sores covering his hands. Beneath the linen, down in the lower layers of bandaging, crimson blood stained the cloth. I frowned, but listened as Dad began to speak.

"As you know Kenji, your 15th birthday is fast approaching. And, for many swordsmen, they go through a ceremony on this birthday. I believe that you are ready."

My eyes widened. I knew what Dad was talking about, did that mean…

"I gave Yahiko my sakabatou when you were young and now I think that it is your time to have it. You have grown up so much Kenji, and I am very proud of you." He smiled at me, and then hissed in pain as I began to wrap new bandages around the lesions on his hands. I made a comforting sound in the back of my throat, and then went silent as he sighed in relief and then continued in a soft voice. "I had wished to test you myself, but I'm too sick, too old."

"Dad…" I protested. "You're not old!"

He chuckled slightly. "As much as you'd like to believe that, yes I am Kenji. I may not look it, but I am getting up there in years."

I blinked, tying off the final bandage and setting my hands in my lap. "Well how old are you?"

"Ah, thank you Kenji, that feels much better. I'm fifty-two."

That shocked me. "Fifty-two!"

My father laughed. "I know Kenji, I don't look that old, but believe me, I can feel it. My body is giving out on me, I can no longer wield the sword as I once did, nor can I do much else."

I looked down. I had had no idea how old my father really was, and this new knowledge shocked me. My Dad _was_ old, just like he had always said. But he looked so young still, people could mistook him for a teen, or a man in his early to late twenties. I didn't know what to do.

My father sighed again, his fingers touching mine. "Since I cannot test you, I wanted to have Yahiko do it for me. Would this please you Kenji?"

I looked up at him. "I don't care Dad. Whatever you want will make me happy."

His face softened, and I was surprised to see tears filling his eyes. "Oh Kenji…" His fingers touched my cheek. "You're so thoughtful of others. You are everything I wanted you to be, and more." I found myself enclosed in his warm embrace. "You are so much more a man than I was at this age. I am _so_ proud of you aisoku."

My eyes were wide. 'My genpuku… That's what this is about…'

Dad pulled back from me, and I felt his lips against my forehead in a brief affectionate kiss. "I love you Kenji, I hope you never forget that." He smiled then, looking towards the door. "I'll bet your mother has dinner almost ready, why don't you help your father up and we'll go eat."

I stood, pulling him up by his forearm and letting him lean on me as he stumbled. My face was set in determination, and I put an arm around my father's chest. 'I'll help you Dad, until I can't anymore.'

I suddenly smiled. "I almost forgot. I love you too Dad."

His smile lit up the hallway.

* * *

(2 months later)

My birthday. The day that I had been looking forward to, and yet dreading at the same time. My heart was pounding, as it had been for the entire day, and I could feel all of my senses on alert. I just knew that something was going to happen, and unfortunately I was right.

Things seemed to be going normally. Yahiko came around lunch time, a smile on his face and my father's sakabatou through his belt. I gulped at this sight. Yahiko almost never actually carried the old sword; I had rarely seen him with it throughout my childhood. I knew what its presence meant.

Aunt Meg and Sano came as well, Sano on a short visit from his travels. Aunt Meg was only home from Aizu because of my father, she had returned about 5 months ago to continue to look after him. They smiled and wished me a happy birthday, but I could see the tension in Aunt Meg's face. She too was on the edge, just like me.

My father was all smiles and hugs, trying to make me feel better. I knew that he was only putting on the show, trying to make all of us feel like he was fine, that nothing was wrong. I, however, knew better. I could sense my father's pain through his ki, which he had taught me early on to read. He had always liked the idea of me knowing about this ability, and he said that it came in handy often. He was right; with it I was able to tell when he needed rest, although he wouldn't say it. Many times that day I had to take him by the arm and lead him away from the others, make him rest.

He protested whenever I did so, saying that he was fine, telling me that nothing was wrong. It got to the point where I couldn't take it anymore, and for the first time in my life, I talked back to my father.

"Kenji, I told you, I'm fine, I don't have to be looked after like a newborn!" my father said, anger hovering on the edges of his voice.

"No you're not Dad; I can feel it in your ki. Even you don't have that much control when you're not paying attention." I said firmly, pushing him down onto his futon.

He glared up at me. "Kenji Himura, you have no right to order me around like this. I am your father, and I can certainly stay out there with everyone else! You don't have to baby me! I am strong enou—."

I cut him off, pain filtering into my heart. "Father, iie. No, you are not strong enough. Yes, I do I have to baby you. You are not well, and I want you to stay here."

That shocked my father into silence, and he merely stared in my direction, tears welling up in his eyes. I could see his bandaged hands clenching in the blanket I drew over his thin body, and I sighed.

"Dad, please. I'm only worried about you." I reached out to touch his shoulder, more worry filling me as I felt the bones standing out beneath his skin. Mom was right, Dad was much too thin. I scanned his body, noting the protruding cheekbones, pale skin, sunken eyes, and clearly visible ribs. It was like I was seeing my father for the first time in weeks.

I wrapped my arms around my father's neck, putting my face against his skin. "Please, I just want you to stay with me. I don't want you to leave me."

I felt rather than heard his sigh of defeat, and his arms enclosed me. "I don't want to leave you Kenji, but you must understand. I did this for you, my son, and I wouldn't take it back even if the gods gave me the choice. I don't wish for you to live your life with this, and I would have gladly given up my life if it meant that you would live."

I felt tears filling my eyes, and I tightened my hold on Dad slightly, sniffling to hold back the tears. "I know Dad; you've always been like that. But, please, let me help you. I want you to be okay, and I'll do whatever I have to, to try and keep it that way."

My father didn't answer me, and I blinked as I noticed his body shivering in my arms. I pulled away from him to look at his face, and my tears fell. Dad was struggling to breathe, and I could see his eyes dimming. It was another attack, it was taking him now. My eyes widened, and I screamed.

* * *

(Kaoru)

Kenji's scream alerted everyone in the room, and I looked up sharply at the same time Megumi did. We were both on our feet an instant later, Megumi just ahead of me, sprinting towards the room where Kenji had led my husband.

We found Kenji crying, frantically shaking Kenshin and pleading with him to breathe as his lips began to turn blue from lack of air. Megumi instantly went into work, breathing into my husband's mouth and pressing on his chest. Kenji was going into hysterics, and I grabbed him around the waist, pulling him away from Kenshin so Megumi could try and revive him.

Kenji fought my hold, still reaching for Kenshin. "No Dad! Don't leave me!"

I could feel warm tears running down my face, and I held Kenji tighter. "Please Kenji; we have to let Aunt Meg work. She will help your father, but we have to stay out of her way. Please, calm down."

My voice broke through his panic, and his wide eyes met mine. I studied dilated pupils, and then he seemed to calm, nodding slightly.

Megumi's work finally paid off, and Kenshin sucked in a breath, gasping for air. An instant later, when he'd gotten the strength, he came up fighting. Megumi shrieked and barely backed away in time to avoid being struck by Kenshin's flailing fists. I knew what was going on, and I pushed my way through his defenses, grabbing his hands in my own. He had lost both hearing and sight, he was defenseless now. The first thing that had flashed through his mind upon waking had been to fight; he hadn't realized that it was Megumi caring for him.

Once I grabbed his hands I brought the shaking fingers up to my face, pressing them against my skin. Even though I knew he couldn't hear me, I still spoke, if only to reassure myself. "It's only me Kenshin. Feel me, I know you can. It's only me."

His fingers ghosted across my lips, and he seemed to understand my words. His body crumpled, and he fell against me, sobs echoing from his thin body as he clung to me in desperation. I held him gently, rocking him against me. "It's alright…I'm here…."

* * *

Now, I don't really know how old Kenshin was around Kenji's 15th birthday, nor do I know when Kenji was born. I came up with my own timeline here.

_Kenshin and Kaoru's marriage 1881 (Kenshin's age 30, Kaoru 19)  
__Kenji's birth 1888 (Kenshin 37, Kaoru 26)  
__Kenji's fifteenth birthday 1903 (Kenshin 52, Kaoru 41)_

There, timeline! Hope that helps my reasoning. Please review!


	6. Learning Along The Way

Chapter 6

Learning Along The Way

(Kenji)

I sniffled slightly, tears still resident in my mind. I was able to hold back the tears, but only just barely. The sight of my father in front of me, struggling for every breath even as he slept, was nearly too much.

Mom was still sitting on the other side of Dad, bathing his forehead with a cool cloth. A fever now gripped Dad's body, which, according to Aunt Meg, had been able to root in his body because of his malnutrition and weak heart and lungs. Dad had a death grip on the sheets with one hand, another on my own hand, his breathing a whistle in his throat.

Mom had held him for a while, and I had watched amazed as my father cried in front of me. I had never seen him do so, and it was frightening. After he had calmed a bit she had put his hand in mine, and I had sat still while his hands traveled across my face, feeling my features. "Dad?" I whispered as his fingers passed over my lips.

He had apparently felt and understood my word, and he smiled. "K-Kenji…" His voice was shaky and hesitant, and I could hear his fear and worry conveyed in it. He couldn't even hear himself speak; I couldn't imagine what that would be like.

Since then he hadn't let go, not even when Mom had tried to pull his hand from mine. He had shaken his head firmly, tightening his grip. Mom smiled, leaving him alone after that. Now he was sleeping, albeit with difficulty. His breathing was strained, each one hard for him to draw in. Aunt Meg had given him some medicine to ease the pain that she knew he was feeling, and then left to see what she could dig up on a way to make this easier for him.

Mom sighed, smiling at me. "I'm so sorry this had to happen on your birthday Kenji. I had hoped that it wouldn't. I'm proud of how well you've handled this. Your father is very proud of you."

I nodded slightly. "I know Mom. He told me. I just wish that this wouldn't have to happen at all. Why Dad? We need him here… We need him to be fine…"

She stood, going to my side and putting an arm around my shoulders. "I know Kenji, but life isn't always fair. Besides, your father did this for you; he wanted you to live a normal life. Things will be okay, I promise."

I looked back down to where Dad's hand was wrapped around mine, still fighting back the threatening tears. "I hope so Mom…"

* * *

(Kenshin)

I felt like I was going insane. Without the use of any of my senses it was like being locked in a small box, with no way of interacting with the outer world. Kenji's touch on my hand was reassuring, but it was very small.

When I had first come back I didn't know what was going on. My first reaction was to fight; I had felt hands touching me, although there were no images or sounds. For a split second I forgot what had happened to me, and I reacted purely with instinct. I had struck out, not meeting flesh, but the hands had back away from me.

And then another set of hands had grabbed mine, warm, calloused, and yet soft and familiar. I calmed slightly, but my heart was still thundering in my chest, even as I drew breath into unwilling lungs. And then I had felt a face, one that was so familiar and dear that I could not have possibly mistaken it. 'Kaoru…'

In that moment my control had snapped, and I had fallen against my wife, sobbing into her clothing with no abandon. I had cried until I could no more, and then Kaoru had put my hand in another one, one that was smaller, but still calloused from wielding a sword.

I brought my fingers up, over a small chest and a warm neck to the face. Again, this face was dear and close to me, and I knew it almost instantly, even without the small help that he gave me. As my fingers passed over lips they moved, and I recognized the word that was spoken, even if I couldn't hear it. "Dad?"

I smiled then, and spoke. I know what I said, I knew that I had said 'Kenji', but I couldn't hear myself speak. It was hard, not being able to hear it, but I could tell that I had said the correct thing, because an answering smile stretched Kenji's lips, and his head moved in a nod. I returned my hand to his own, squeezing it gently, lovingly.

After a little while I began to feel lightheaded and dizzy, and when I swooned Kaoru's gentle hands, which I could now recognize through touch, took hold of me, lowering me onto a soft futon. I settled into it obediently, lying quiet. There was the touch of a cold hand, and this time I didn't recognize the hands. I frowned, putting up a hand in curiosity. Those chilly hands guided me to a face, and I nodded when I realized that it was Megumi's delicate features that I was feeling.

Her hands went back to touching my face and neck, feeling for my pulse and such things. After a little bit I was hefted into a sitting position and Megumi's hands encouraged me to drink something. I drank it obediently, knowing that it was something that would help me in some way.

Her hands again guided me to her face, and I felt her lips as they moved. The first time she spoke I had trouble understanding, and I tilted my head, my brows twitching together. Megumi repeated herself slowly, patiently. That time I got her message. "I'm leaving Ken-san, I'll be back soon."

I nodded, and then spoke. Again, I didn't hear it, and I wasn't sure if I said it right. It _felt_ right at least. "I understand."

Megumi nodded, and then her hands dropped mine, and I felt her weight on the futon leave. I put out a hand, searching around for Kenji or Kaoru. I met Kaoru's slender fingers, and I wrapped my hand around hers. I felt a gentle touch on my other hand, and I held Kenji's hand in my own.

Kaoru's hand left mine, and at first I felt fear flood through me, but Kenji's fingers tightened around mine in a reassuring squeeze and I calmed. Then a cold cloth settled on my forehead, and I understood what was going on. I instead laced my fingers in the sheets covering my body, wanting the security of something in my hands. I closed my eyes, and slowly the touch of Kenji's hand faded, and I sank further into the never-ending silent darkness.

* * *

(Kaoru)

I sighed, stirring the soup with almost an automatic action. I barely noticed what I was doing, I was thinking. Kenshin was obviously alright, he seemed to be fairly calm and secure. But I knew that looks were deceiving. There was a strong chance that Kenshin was hiding what he was really thinking from both Kenji and I, and I knew that I needed to just be ready for whatever Kenshin might need.

After he had fallen asleep, I had left Kenji in there to care for him, and I had come to make some soup. Megumi had said that we should try and get him to eat, as he was much too thin. I knew this for a fact, I had been telling him for months that he needed to eat better.

A piercing cry scared me into dropping my spoon into the pot of soup. I barely had the time to pull it out of the fire as I shot to my feet, running into the bedroom where the cry had come from. I found Kenshin holding Kenji's wrists in iron lock holds, a snarl on his lips. Kenji's hands were white, and tears flowing down my son's face.

I jumped forward, grabbing Kenshin's hands and putting one to my cheek. "Kenshin, it's okay!"

Kenji choked from behind me, terror in the sound. I knew what had happened, even if Kenji might not tell me. Kenshin had woken, and, because of his training as an assassin, his first thought, just like the first one had been to fight. Kenji must have been doing something that attracted what senses Kenshin had left. The cry I had heard had been Kenji, not Kenshin.

Kenshin was breathing heavily, his body trembling. I kept a hold on his hand, turning to look at my frightened son. "Kenji, what happened?"

He whimpered. "I… I was just changing the cloth, but I, I dropped it by accident. It hit Dad's chest and all of the sudden he was sitting up, grabbing me…" He choked again. "His eyes…"

I sighed again, trying to think of some way we could convey this message to Kenshin, knowing that he would need to know in order to think of a way to control these urges. If Kenji was to help me take care of Kenshin, I needed him to stop reacting with fight, and instead acting with questions.

"Kenji, give me your wrist." I said, holding out my free hand for his hand. He raised it obediently, and I examined the skin silently. There was a slight darkening to Kenji's fair skin already, and I knew that it would bruise. His skin was hot, and I hoped that the feeling of that would get some of what had happened across to Kenshin. I pulled Kenji forward, putting Kenshin's hand against his wrist.

Kenshin's eyebrows twitched together as he ran gentle fingers around Kenji's wrist, still not understanding. He felt Kenji's hand, and I could see the recognition of who it was in his mind, but the feeling was still not registering.

I brought the hand that I held up to my mouth, doing what Megumi done to let Kenshin know that she was leaving. His fingers rested against my lips, and he turned his head towards me. I spoke slowly, giving him time to comprehend what I was saying. "You grabbed Kenji, Kenshin. That was Kenji you had a hold of."

He blinked a few times, and then his face grew pained. His hand ran up Kenji's arm, searching for his face. When he got there he felt with worry the tears of fear that were still soaking Kenji's cheeks, running his fingers over Kenji's face. "I'm sorry…" Kenshin whispered, drawing Kenji close to him, tears filling his eyes as well.

Kenji shook his head slightly. "It's okay Dad…"

I knew that Kenshin hadn't gotten that message, but he seemed to understand that Kenji forgave him, mostly because of how the boy hugged him back tightly. Kenshin pulled back slightly, turning his head back to me. "Will it bruise?"

It surprised me as Kenshin spoke a full sentence to me, even though he couldn't hear what he was saying. Kenji answered him for me, nodding into his father's neck. Kenshin's face fell, and I could see how sorry he really was for what had happened. He reached down, taking a gentle hold of Kenji's wrist and bringing it up to his face. I smiled as Kenshin dropped a gentle kiss on the inner skin of both of Kenji's wrists, a little smile on his face. "Sorry Kenji."

Kenji smiled as well, and he leaned back into Kenshin's embrace, resting his head against my husband's chest. Kenshin wrapped his arms around Kenji, rocking him gently, the way he would when Kenji was around four or five, humming an old lullaby on instinct. Even though Kenji had grown out of things like that years ago, I could see his body relaxing, and he closed his eyes, sighing happily.

"I love you Kenji…" Kenshin whispered. He raised his head towards me. "I love you Kaoru."

I smiled, tears filling my eyes. There was hope, and we would have to learn along the way, the three of us together. We would deal with this tragedy, in the best way we could. Hopefully life would only get better.


	7. The Long Kept Truth

Chapter 7

The Long Kept Truth

(Kenji)

I yawned, stretching from my position in my futon. I didn't want to get up, but I instinctively knew that I really should. It was nearly time for breakfast, and it was my turn to cook. Mom and Dad were probably still sleeping. I knew that they had been up late last night, for reasons I didn't know. They had been sitting in the practice room, just sitting there. It had been confusing to me, but I had left them alone and gone to bed.

I stood, pulling off my yukata and getting dressed in a clean gi and hakama. I combed out my loose red hair and then tied it in a topknot, leaving the room. I sighed slightly as I began the meal, thinking back to the last year.

Dad had been permanently blind and deaf for a year now, and to my relief things were getting better. He no longer reacted violently if you touched him or woke him, he would first seek out a hand or a face. He could easily communicate with us, though he still had some trouble reading what we said in our lips. We had to speak more slowly for him, and sometimes repeat it.

I still hated the fact that I was the cause of this pain for him. If I hadn't been born the way I had been, he would still be relatively healthy, not a dying blind and deaf man. Aunt Meg had been right, Dad's heart was growing weaker, he had trouble breathing now, he couldn't run, he couldn't do anything strenuous, even lifting the laundry basket or helping with cleaning the dojo. It was too much for his heart and lungs; he would loose his breath easily, and then have trouble regaining it.

I wished often that there was some way I could help him. Something I could do to give him back what he had lost, to help him live a normal life just like he had done for me. I had tried often to talk with the gods, but they never answered me, they remained silent.

I suddenly heard a cry, and I looked up sharply. 'Mom!'

* * *

(Kaoru)

I woke to a twisting body beside me. My eyes snapped open and I looked instantly to Kenshin. He had a hand clenched in the cloth of his yukata over his heart, his body bucking as he struggled to breathe. He was choking and gagging, his face growing pale. I screamed, shooting upright on the bed.

I quickly tried to hold Kenshin down, trying to get him still so I could give him air. He fought me, white glazed eyes wide and staring straight through me. "Please Kenshin!" I said pleadingly, even though I knew he couldn't hear me. He still fought, body twisting in a frantic attempt to get away from me.

Kenji ran into the room at that moment, swearing under his breath when he saw what was happening. If I hadn't been so worried I might have stopped to tell him not to swear, but at that moment Kenshin opened his mouth, letting out a piercing scream. I pulled away from him at that, fear flooding into me.

Kenji closed his eyes and covered his ears at the sound, cringing away from his father. Kenshin kept screaming, his body still twisting and bucking. Now I realized, he wasn't trying to get away from me, he was trying to escape the pain.

I stood, frantically running to get a shawl and wrap it around my shoulders. I ran from the room, one purpose in my mind. Get Megumi.

* * *

(Kenji)

When I opened my eyes Mom was gone, and Dad was no longer screaming, but still obviously in pain. I ran to his side, pulling one of his hands from where they were both fisted over his heart, wrapping my fingers in his and showing that I was there for him.

His grasp was tight, his fingers curled into vice-like grips. I continued to hold his hand, though I was terrified. After a while Dad's body began to stop moving and he sank back into the blankets, his grip on my hand loosening and finally going limp.

I sighed, releasing the limp hand and taking a cloth from my gi. I wiped the sweat from Dad's face, and then cleaned away the blood trickling from between his lips where he'd probably bitten his tongue. 'How many times am I going to have to do this?' I thought worriedly. 'How much longer is Dad going to be able to hold out against this massive pain?'

I felt anger flare up in me and I raised my face to the sky. "How much longer is he going to suffer?"

My breathing was heavy, caused by my heightened emotions, and I looked back down to Dad's pale face, sighing as I wiped the cloth over his forehead one last time. What I didn't expect was to be answered.

_How much longer, Himura Kenji? _

I gasped, looking around frantically. I suddenly realized that I was finally being answered. "What do you want? Why do you allow him to suffer like this!"

There was a chuckle. _He exchanged his sight and hearing for your own Himura Kenji. This is simply a side-effect._

I growled. "The side-effect is pain? Maybe even his life? Do you want him to die?"

_Well, actually, you seem to have pinpointed my purpose._

My jaw dropped. "You…you want him to die?" I blinked, looking back down at my father. "Why? What has he ever done? He's a good man!"

Again that chuckle that drove me insane. _Ah, so he is now, but what about in his younger days? Have you forgotten that time Himura Kenji?_

I blinked, confused. "Younger days? What did Dad do?"

_You don't know? I see, he has been afraid to tell you. Well, I'm no longer giving him that choice. You will see now, you will know. And you will understand why Himura Kenshin's life is mine to claim. _

The walls around me began to swirl together, and I felt my body growing light and weightless. Black crept in, and I fell across my father's body as I sank into the blackness.

* * *

I opened my eyes with a start, sitting up straight. I shook my head, trying to clear away the last vestiges of dizziness. When I had done so I looked around myself curiously.

I was in Kyoto! I could see familiar buildings, and I stood, walking around slowly. But, it was different somehow. There was something that wasn't quite the same. I looked through the dark window of one of the shops, trying to find a clue about what was going on. There was no one around; there was no way to find out anything.

Suddenly a man stepped from around the corner. I automatically took a step back, blinking at the sight of him. He was tall, wearing a cloak that concealed his entire being, and possessed calculating crimson eyes. "Come Himura Kenji. I will show you the reason behind my doings."

I knew that this was the mysterious voice I had heard, and I followed him silently and with no complaint. He led me through the darkened streets, and I finally decided to ask him where we were. "What's going on?"

I could hear the faint chuckle from him easily even though he wasn't facing me. "Kyoto, 1864."

I blinked. "1864?"

"Indeed. Himura Kenshin is currently 15 years old. He is fighting in the Bakumatsu, leaving his own mark upon the history. Ah, there he is now."

I looked up to see a figure standing in front of me, staring ahead of him with intent. There were three other people walking along, chatting idly as they did so. I looked back to the person standing in front of me, and I recognized Dad's crimson hair, even in the shadows, tied in a topknot like mine. 'Dad never puts his hair up like that…' I thought faintly.

As the men passed my father took a step, his hand tightening around a hilt at his side. "You are Jubee Shigekura, of the Kyoto Shoshidai, aren't you?"

I blinked. "What is he doing?"

The figure beside me shook his head. "Just watch Himura Kenji, you will see."

"And now old man, you will pay for your tyranny."

At that moment my father was rushed by one of the men, but he dodged easily, slamming the sheath of his sword into the man's eye, unsheathing the sword and slicing through the man in one fluid motion. I gasped, taking a step back. Dad slaughtered all of the men there, only earning himself one stripe of what would later become the cross-shaped scar that marked his face.

I looked to the man beside me, terror on my face. "What's going on? Tell me why you're showing me this!"

"Because this makes Himura Kenshin the strongest, and this is why I wanted to destroy him, and why I ended up losing my life for that purpose. It is not fair that he continues to live on, unspoiled by what happened to him."

I realized now that this man was crazy, that I needed to go back to my father. "Take me back home!"

The man shook his head. "Iie Himura Kenji, you have yet to understand what I want to show you. You do not know the extent of your father's crimes."

Images began to flash before me, men being sliced in half, heads rolling, bodies falling, blood spraying. And my father, my gentle, peaceful father, was the wielder of the sword that did it all.

"No! Stop! Stop it! STOP!" I screamed, shielding my eyes frantically. The images finally stopped moving, and I looked at the man standing beside me. I didn't realize that there were tears on my face until I felt the warmth of them rolling down my cheeks. I wiped them away frantically, staring through clouded blue eyes at the man that had taken me here. "What do you mean to say by this?"

The man shook his head. "You still do not understand. Himura Kenshin, your father, was the Hitokiri Battousai, responsible for hundreds of lives being ended, for shedding the blood that made Kyoto's streets turn red."

This hit me like lighting, and I felt my knees give out. "W-what? Dad? A…murderer?"

"Ah, so you see it now. Do you know now why I want your father's life, Himura Kenji?"

I couldn't speak, couldn't think. 'Dad…what have you been telling me all my life that I never knew this? What have you been hiding from me? And _why_?'


	8. Terror

Chapter 8

Terror

(Kaoru)

I came running up to the dojo in time to hear a sharp cry from inside. It was Kenshin, I recognized his voice instantly. Megumi, who was running beside me, swore and ran faster, gripping her medical bag tighter.

We both burst into the bedroom at the same time, fearful to see what was wrong. But it wasn't quite what either of us expected, and Megumi dropped her supplies in shock as I gasped.

Kenshin seemed fine, he was sitting up in the bed, but his arms were wrapped around a limp Kenji. My son's eyes were wide, pupils non-existent in his blue-violet depths. His body was jerking, as though he was having some sort of attack, like the ones Kenshin had periodically. The sound of his tortured breathing was enough to make me scream.

I knew then why Kenshin had cried out. He didn't understand, he had to have woken up to find Kenji like that, sprawled on the futon, body jerking in the throes of some seizure. He was afraid, clutching Kenji close to his chest in fear.

I ran forward, prying at Kenshin's hands. He cried out again, this time a coherent word. "IIE!"

I put my hand in his, and I watched recognition dawn on his features, and he loosened his grip on our son. Megumi instantly ran forward, checking over Kenji while I sought to calm Kenshin down. Tears were flowing with no abandon down my husband's face, and he clung to me in fear and worry, my name a whispering cry on his lips.

I petted his hair gently, putting one of his hands to my mouth. "Megumi's here, she'll help Kenji."

He nodded, showing his understanding, but he continued shaking violently, tears still tracing paths down his cheeks. I held him close, watching with fear as Megumi tried to figure out what was wrong with our son.

* * *

(Kenji)

I sat in shock for a moment, the strange man in front of me watching silently as I did so. I couldn't believe what I had heard. Dad had been hiding who he was all this time? Sure, he had been having the problems with no sight and no hearing, but he still should have told me. It would have been easier to deal with if I had heard it from Dad himself, not this strange person.

I looked up finally, staring at the figure in shock. "Why are you showing me this? To torment me?"

He snorted. "Himura Kenshin's life is mine, and this will make you understand why. That is all there is to it."

I suddenly frowned. "My father's life belongs to no one, only himself. You have no right to do this to him. Even if he is a murderer, even if he did keep this from me, he probably had his reasons. And I would have much rather heard it from him, not from you!"

I stood, glaring at the man in front of me. He laughed. "Such a strong spirit you have Himura Kenji. You take after your father in more ways than just looks. Perhaps I should get rid of you before I take his life. To cause him even more pain."

I growled. "You'll have to try it before you sound so confident. I won't let you take me that easily."

I heard rather than saw the man's grin as he laughed again. "Very well. I will have to show you the hard way who is the stronger here."

I clenched my hand into a fist, and suddenly something stopped it from closing fully. I looked down, and then my eyes widened. The sakabatou! Its familiar hilt was clenched in my hand, the blade shining faintly in the dim light. I raised it, silently running my fingers over the tsuba. I felt the sheath at my belt, its small but significant weight comforting me in some way. I grinned, sheathing the blade with a sharp click. Now I had a way to fight back, with the faithful sword that I had inherited from my father sometime after my 16th birthday, not long after his deafness had set in.

With the familiar weight of the sakabatou at my side I felt my confidence surge, and I got into a battoujutsu stance. I had seen Yahiko do it before, and my father long ago. It was a faint memory, but I had never forgotten it. I had even trained a little with Master Hiko, without my father's knowledge. I could perform a passable battoujustu, and even a few other attacks, such as the Ryu Tsui Sen and a Ryu Sho Sen.

I heard a chuckle from the figure in front of me. "Well now, just like your father. Do you really think that you can defeat _me_ Himura Kenji?"

I grinned. "I don't know, but I can sure as hell try. For my father, I will try to pound you into the ground. My father deserves better than this, no matter who he was. You have no right."

There was another chuckle, and then he charged me. I set my hand lightly on the sakabatou's hilt, and I could almost feel it thrumming in response to my ki. I smiled. 'Well… it seems as if we are going to get to battle together after all…'

* * *

(Kaoru)

Kenji's body suddenly went completely still and his wide eyes slid shut. He was quiet, breathing calming down into a steady peaceful rhythm. Megumi blinked, moving away from him.

"Well, at least he's okay now…" I murmured.

Megumi frowned. "Hai, but I'm still not sure what's going on here. This is certainly confusing. We'll just have to keep a close eye on Kenji to make sure that nothing goes wrong."

I nodded; reassuring Kenshin that Kenji was alright by bringing my husband's trembling hand to rest against Kenji's chest. Kenshin moved closer to Kenji, seeking out the boy's hand and holding it tight in his own.

I sighed, running a hand through my slightly sweaty bangs. They had grown matted to my forehead because of my headlong run to Megumi's clinic, and I brushed them away impatiently. 'I hope you're alright Kenji. Please wake up soon…'

* * *

(Kenji)

I dodged again, my breathing only a little unsteady. This man had yet to land a blow on me, but I had only hit him once. I was starting to get a little worried. The man came towards me again, brandishing the sword he had seemed to get out of nowhere, just like the sakabatou had appeared at my side.

"You are doing well Himura Kenji. You truly are your father's son. But I'm getting tired of this nonsense," he said, untying the clasp of his cloak and throwing it away from himself.

I looked upon a bandaged face, the gleaming crimson eyes still watching me idly. I blinked, tilting my head slightly. "I know you…"

"You do? Well this is something I'd like to hear about."

I took a step closer, my eyes narrowing in confusion. "A story… One that my Dad told me… He told me about a scar that I saw on his shoulder…"

"Ah, yes, I remember that… Such a nasty taste he had, your father. I regret taking that bite out of his shoulder."

I felt my face contort into a snarl and I took a step back. "Shishio! You're Shishio! But how… Dad said that you died!"

"I did. And I still blame Himura Kenshin for that. He was at fault, so I have decided that he will also have to suffer a dishonorable death, one that leaves him helpless, unable to even wield the sakabatou, unable to see or hear," said the man I now identified as one of my father's old enemies.

I growled. "You…bastard."

Shishio chuckled at that comment. "Are you going to talk Himura Kenji? Or are you going to fight?"

I sheathed the sakabatou quickly, dropping comfortably into the battoujutsu stance. "Come."

Shishio's crimson eyes closed. "So much like your father… I really should kill you first. Let him suffer more before I claim his life." Those eyes snapped open and he grinned, his grip tightening on his sword. "Very well."

My eyes narrowed, I felt myself calm into a perfect state for fighting. I centered myself, and then the sakabatou left its sheath in a surprisingly fast battousjutsu. It hit Shishio in the middle, knocking him to the side. I was up and going instantly, a Ryu Tsui Sen taking shape as I leapt high.

The next thing I knew there was pain. Blinding pain. A choked gasp escaped my mouth; the sakabatou fell from my limp fingers. It clattered loudly to the ground, and I felt the warmth of blood trickling down my skin.

Shishio grinned up at me. "You forgot to think about the fact that I might not be as hurt as I seemed Himura Kenji. You underestimated me, a costly mistake."

I coughed, and tasted the metallic coppery flavor of blood in my mouth. Shishio withdrew his sword from where it was embedded in my stomach, and I fell heavily to the ground. Black clouded my vision, and I struggled to sit up and face him again.

Shishio stood over me, glaring down at me with nothing but disgust and loathing. I blinked slowly, my eyelids growing heavier and heavier. "Goodbye Himura Kenji."

The world faded.

* * *

(Kaoru)

Blood suddenly covered the body of my son, pouring from both a sudden hole in his stomach and his mouth, and the boy choked. I screamed, backing away from him in horror.

Kenshin, who didn't hear nor understand, didn't notice until the warmth of Kenji's blood slid over his fingers. Then he too began to scream, his hand jerking back as though he had been burnt. Megumi pushed him towards me, and I caught him before he could hit the ground.

Megumi began working instantly to stop the blood flow, while Kenshin shivered in my arms. 'What is going on here?' I thought frantically.

* * *

I'm an ass, aren't I? Don't worry, I'll update soon! 


	9. Things Will Be Okay

Chapter 9

Things Will Be Okay

Shishio stood over the still body of Himura Kenji, triumph shining in his eyes as he flicked his sword to rid it of blood. He regarded the limp figure quietly, thinking on the best way to get rid of the small menace.

"How to do it, this is always the hardest, and yet most fun part…" Shishio mused out-loud, pacing around the crumpled body. "Should I cut off your limbs and watch as you bleed to death? Or should I gut you like a hunted animal?"

Himura Kenji gave no response, he was out. Shishio nudged the boy's body, curious to see if there would be a reaction to his thoughts. There was nothing at all, and he shrugged halfway. "Let's see if I can get you to wake up…"

He pointed the sword at the boy's forearm, putting the tip against his skin. Still there was no reaction, and then the man began to push it down. Kenji's face twitched at the penetration, and then scrunched as the pain grew. Finally glazed blue-violet eyes opened to stare at him.

"Oh, so you are in there." Shishio murmured, withdrawing the sword and leaning against it as he crouched beside the boy. "Now then, what should I do with you?"

Kenji started to struggle into a sitting position, reaching out shaking fingers for the sakabatou's hilt. Shishio watched idly, letting the boy do so. Even if he did get a hold of the sword, there was no doubt in Shishio's mind that the boy wouldn't be able to do anything.

Kenji managed to drag himself to his feet, leaning heavily on the sakabatou. Kenji's eyes were clouded with pain, but he was glaring at the man with a hatred that rivaled Shishio's own of Kenshin. "You….bastard…" Kenji managed to choke out.

Shishio chuckled slightly. "I've been told that many times, boy. Now, what do you plan to do, in your weak state?"  
Kenji trembled, his stance faltering for a second, and then strengthening. "I'll beat you… I don't know how… But I will."

Shishio had to restrain the need to snort. "You can hardly stand Himura Kenji, how do you expect to even be a threat to me? You probably couldn't even lift that pathetic sword."

Kenji's eyes flashed, resembling the liquid gold that made Himura Battousai the famed demon of the shadows. "This sword is not pathetic. It is a strong symbol of the man that my father is, one that uses swords to help, not to kill."

Shishio once again restrained a snort, lifting his sword to drape it over his shoulders and rising to a stand. "That sword is weak, as is Himura Kenshin. But I tire of this meaningless conversation. It is your time to die Himura Kenji."

Kenji growled softly, sounding and looking more like the manslayer of the Bakumatsu. "I will not die. Not to a bastard like you."

Shishio raised his sword, getting ready to thrust it directly into Kenji's chest. With a cry of triumph he lunged forward, preparing to deliver the killing blow to the boy. Kenji brought the sakabatou's blade up at the last instant, blocking Shishio's sword away and jumping backwards. Although a little surprised, Shishio allowed none of that to show as he swung around and attacked again.

Kenji blocked him once more, this time adding force behind his defense. Shishio winced as he hit the blade with his own; it was like striking a brick wall. Kenji was remarkably strong for just standing after that first wound, and Shishio was starting to wonder if his thoughts were correct.

Kenji smiled triumphantly in Shishio's face, wrenching the sakabatou's hilt downwards. The blade smoothly moved up and over Shishio's own, fluidly moving to strike towards Shishio's face. With an inhumane snarl the man leapt backwards, barely missing having the strong blunt edge of the sakabatou driven into his nose.

Kenji grinned, his eyes now swirling with gold. The boy was finding that his strength was returning, he was growing more refreshed by the second. There was no more pain, no more weakness. 'For you Dad, I will beat this enemy…'

Shishio's face twisted in a snarl, and he once again charged at the boy. "What is going on here! You should be half dead!"

Kenji met Shishio's strike head on with one of his own, the blades clashing together with a ringing of metal. The sakabatou sang in Kenji's hands, the boy again felt the kindred spirit within the sword. He sprang backwards, and then flung himself into the battle, a Ryu Tsui Sen echoing from his lips as he struck at Shishio.

The other was caught off guard, and the sakabatou slammed into his body with incredible force. Coughing, he found himself on the ground, unable to rise. Pain filled him, and he quickly assessed that his spine had no doubt been broken from the downward force of the boy's attack. The pressure had been too great, and his spine had snapped.

Kenji stood over him, breathing heavily and staring at him with golden eyes, the eyes of Himura the Battousai. "You are cocky, but you won't beat me. I have too much at stake. Now give my father back his life, you bastard."

Shishio sneered. "Why would I do that Himura Kenji? He bargained for your own senses, thereby surrendering his own to me!"

Shishio gulped as he suddenly found the sakabatou's blunt edge pressed against his throat. "Now, Shishio, before I break your neck." Kenji hissed, his amber eyes glowing from just beneath the shade of his crimson bangs.

"You won't kill me." Shishio said confidently. "You can't do that, you're too much your father's son."

Kenji's grin reminded Shishio disturbingly of that of a demon. "Oh really? If that's what you believe, then you are seriously mistaken. Just as I'm sure my father would give anything to keep me safe, I would do the same for him. Even if it means taking a life. Besides, this isn't technically the shedding of blood. The sakabatou's blade will still be unblemished."

Shishio saw the murder in the boy's eyes, and he was afraid. He still, however, refused to take away the future he had given to Kenshin. "I won't do what you want Himura Kenji. The life of Himura Kenshin is mine; he gave it to me when he bargained for your senses."

Kenji rolled his eyes. "So stubborn. Very well then."

The pressure of the sakabatou began to increase marginally, and Shishio found himself choking as his air was cut off. Even though the man was dead, pain and air still applied to his form in this vision. The boy could very well kill him, and he would be sent to the deepest pits of Hell, never to move again.

"Wait Himura Kenji!"

Kenji looked up sharply, the blade of the sakabatou pulling back with him. Shishio gasped for precious air, and he looked over to see a form standing there. He couldn't quite make out the figure…

A stern voice echoed. "You have overstepped your boundaries Makoto Shishio, and it is time that this comes to an end."

A whirling vortex filled Shishio's vision, and he was pulled, screaming, back into the darkest pits of Hell where he belonged.

* * *

(Kenji)

I stood quietly, the sakabatou hanging limply from my grasp to trail in the dust on the stones beneath my feet. My breath was still slightly heavy, but my draining rage was making my heart slow, and in turn, my breathing.

I did not know the face in front of me, but I felt somehow that it was important. "Who are you?" I murmured.

She smiled, taking a step closer. "You would not know me, Himura Kenji. My name is Tomoe, but I will let your father tell you more about me when he deems the time right." She shook her head gently. "Kami-sama has been blind to this for too long, and he has decided to set things right. Neither you, nor Himura Kenshin was supposed to experience any of this; Kami-sama wanted Kenshin to live a normal, happy life, with a healthy son that loved him."

She moved forward to stand next to me, running her fingers along my chest and stomach. I stood stock still, allowing her to do so while I watched with calm eyes. Instantly I felt flesh knitting, and my wounds were healed. I felt perfectly well again, and I suddenly understood. "My strength, in the battle. That was you!"

She nodded with a smile. "Hai, it was. I didn't want you to suffer, and I knew that you could fight him off. I just never expected…"

I tilted my head. "What Tomoe-san?"

She smiled. "So like your father, so polite…" She reached up, her fingers ghosting across the corners of my eyes. "You had your father's eyes, for a moment there, burning with the fires within.. I knew then, you would do whatever it took to protect your father, and it was then that I had to make an appearance."

I closed my eyes, bowing my head. "I am certainly glad that you did, for I fear what I might have done."

Tomoe raised my head with gentle fingers beneath my chin, a smile on her pale face. "It is alright now Himura Kenji, things will be okay. Now, it's time for you to go back to your family. You have done well. And, Himura Kenji, I would like you tell your father something for me. Tell him that I love him, and I meant to do what I did. I was given the choice to take it back, but I turned it down, because I knew that it was meant to be. If I hadn't he wouldn't have had you."

The words implanted themselves in my brain, and I knew that I would never forget them, even if I tried. I nodded. "Hai, I will Tomoe-san."

She smiled. "Arigatou. Now then, it's time to return to your body." My vision suddenly exploded into dots, like I was having a dizzy spell of sorts. I fought the blackness, but Tomoe's voice stopped that. "Easy Himura Kenji, this is normal. Time to wake up…. Wake up…"

* * *

"Wake up. Kenji, wake up!"

I opened my eyes blearily, blinking in the light. "M-Mom?"

I heard her sigh of relief. "Oh Kami-sama, Kenji, you scared the daylights out of me! I was so worried, for a minute you were wounded, and then you went so still, I didn't know what was going on…"

I cut her off with a smile as I sat up. "Mom, it's okay, I'm fine." I looked around. "Where's Dad?"

At that moment I heard Aunt Meg's voice from just outside, and she sounded worried. "Kaoru!"

My mother was on her feet in an instant, running from the room. I followed her quickly, worry flooding through me. Mom wrenched open the shoji door, and then cried out. "Oh no, not again!"

Aunt Meg was kneeling on the floor next to my father, who was lying limply beside her. She was trying desperately to find out what was wrong with him, but somehow I felt no more fear at this sight. I looked up, past my mother, Aunt Meg, and the figure of my father. There, standing in the hall, was Tomoe. She smiled, her voice a floating whisper in my mind. 'Things will be fine Himura Kenji…'

Dad let out a groan, bringing up a hand to rub at his forehead. Aunt Meg moved away from him, allowing him the room to sit up. I watched as my father stiffened, and I suddenly knew what Tomoe had meant. "Dad?" I whispered.

Mom looked at me funny, she didn't realize. But then Dad looked up, and opened his eyes. They were sparkling with tears, clear as water. "Kenji…" he murmured, putting out a hand to me. "Oh Kami, Kenji…"

I ran to his side, throwing myself into his arms. He held me tightly, and I felt his tears wetting my hair. "Dad, I'm so glad you're okay…"

Mom was crying, I could hear her as Dad took an arm away from me to welcome her into the happy embrace. Things were back to normal, and I knew then, that I owed it all to Tomoe-san, the mysterious woman from Dad's past that smelled of white plums.


	10. The End Of The Journey

Chapter 10

The End of the Journey

(Kenji)

Long after my vision I kept replaying Tomoe-san's words in my mind, thinking of how I would tell Dad what I had seen. He was curious; I knew that because he asked me what had happened. He knew that something big had happened, but he wasn't quite sure.

Dad released me slowly, tears still flowing slowly down his cheeks, wetting my hand as I wiped them away gently. He smiled, touching my face with a hand. "How you've grown Kenji…" He suddenly chuckled slightly. "You look so much like me at this age…"

I smiled back at him. "Thanks Dad."

Dad put his other hand to my cheek, pulling my head forward and putting his forehead against mine. "I'm so proud of you Kenji…"

I wrapped my arms tightly around Dad's shoulders, hugging myself to his body. "I'm proud of you too Dad… You really were there for me, even though you were having troubles of your own."

Dad's arms tightened around me, and he chuckled lightly. "I tried Kenji. I never wanted you to be alone." I felt his lips against my hair. "I love you so much aisoku."

I smiled. "I love you too Dad."

Mom was wiping at her face with her kimono sleeve, smiling and laughing through her tears. "Well, I think I'll go make some tea, and let you two redheads have a talk."

I knew that Mom was letting us have our time together, knowing that Dad was confused on what had happened, and it was better that we both have that time together to be able to explain what both of us had experienced, and a bit more time to just get over the immense shock that we had just gone through. She would be back to hear the story later.

"Now Kenji, what happened? Why did you just pass out like that?" Dad murmured, sitting with his arm around my shoulders as we leaned against the wall.

"I was sitting in here with you, and then there was a voice. It was the person that you first made the deal with. I told it that I didn't understand why you were suffering so, and it said that it would show me." I answered, leaning my head to the side. "I felt dizzy, and then I woke up in Kyoto."

Dad's breath was sucked in, his chest stuttering beneath my shoulder. "Kyoto? Are you sure?"

I nodded. "Yea, that person told me. I saw you, Dad." I paused for a minute, and I could almost feel Dad's heart skip a beat. "I saw you kill a man."

"Oh no…" Dad's arms pulled me closer, and I felt my hair growing wet again as he sobbed against me. "Oh Kenji, I'm so sorry… I never wanted you to find out that way…. I was going to tell you…"

I shook my head, hugging him tightly. "It's alright Dad. I understand why you didn't want to tell me, I don't hate you for what you did. You were just fighting in a war; you did what you had too."

Dad nodded, stubbornly swiping at his tears and settling back against me. "And after that? What happened then?"

"Well, at first when I got there I was weaponless, but when the man said that he was going to kill me, but then the sakabatou appeared." I murmured, still pondering on how it had gotten there in the first place.

"'Appeared?' What do you mean by that?" Dad asked, confusion showing in his voice.

"I'm still not sure myself. It was just suddenly in my hand, the sheath at my side. I'm glad it was, it gave me the chance to fight back to that man. He…." I paused, remembering the shock of seeing my enemy for the first time. "He was someone I knew, surprisingly."

"Knew? You knew him?"

"Hai. Remember when I saw that scar on your shoulder?" I snaked my fingers in his gi, lightly touching where the scar resided. He nodded, curious. "It was him. Shishio Makoto."

Dad's eyes narrowed in fury. "Shishio…. I should have known that he would be involved in this somehow."

"He called you names, and it made me mad." I frowned, looking down. "I felt so angry, I just wanted to make him pay for what he was doing to you. I was fighting well for a minute, but then, I just… I don't know, but I was getting ready for a Ryu Tsui Sen…"

"A Ryu Tsui Sen? How did you learn that? Kenji…" Dad's voice changed to one of scolding and he frowned at me.

I grinned sheepishly. "Oh…yea… Um… I was meaning to tell you about that…"

He blinked. "So that's where you disappeared to right after your genpuku ceremony. Kaoru never did tell me where you went." He grinned. "I'm not angry with you, but I am a little upset that you didn't at least tell me. I would rather know that you were going there than find out later that you did so without my permission."

"I was afraid you'd say no…" I murmured, looking down.

Dad sighed. "Hai, I suppose I would have…" He shook himself lightly. "Please, continue Kenji."

"I tried to do a Ryu Tsui Sen, but he must have gotten up faster than I thought from my hitting him earlier. He stabbed me in the stomach, and I passed out…" I said quietly. "After that the first thing I remember is waking up to him pushing the tip of his sword through my arm."

"That must have been when you started bleeding…." Dad's voice sounded terrified, and I looked up into his closed eyes and tense face. "I was so afraid…. All I could feel was your blood, and it was all over my hands, I didn't know what to do, I didn't know what was going on…"

I touched his hand slightly, and then continued my story. "I managed to get a hold of the sakabatou, and stand, but I was having trouble standing, but all of the sudden he started insulting you again. And the sakabatou, and what it stands for…"

Dad growled lowly in his throat. "Shishio always did have a fondness for mocking me and my beliefs…"

"He attacked me again, but all of my strength suddenly started coming back. I didn't understand, but my wounds were healing, and I was getting stronger. I started to fight back again. I did a Ryu Tsui Sen again, and this time I hit him. I must have done so really hard, because he didn't get back up. I think that I broke his spine." I said thoughtfully, considering what Shishio had done.

"Really? Kami-sama Kenji, you had to have had a lot of force behind that attack. I've never done that before." Dad murmured. "Of course when I would have been aiming to break something I would never aim for the spine, nor put that much force behind it."

"I was so angry… I wanted to kill him, to make him pay for what he's done to you…" I whispered, looking down at my hands.

I felt Dad flinch. "You…. You didn't, did you Kenji?"

I shook my head slightly. "Iie. I was stopped before I did."

Dad blinked. "Stopped? By who?"

I smiled then. "By a woman that smelled like white plums."

I could see the recognition dawn on Dad's face, his eyes growing wide. "T-Tomoe…"

"She said that Kami-sama never wanted this to happen, that Shishio interfered. She said that you were supposed to have a normal life, and that I was supposed to be born healthy. And… She told me that I had your eyes for a moment… Amber eyes." I sighed, and then continued on quietly. "And she had a message for you Dad."

"A…A message?"

I nodded, leaning my head back against Dad's shoulder. "She said, and I quote, 'Tell him that I love him, and I meant to do what I did. I was given the choice to take it back, but I turned it down, because I knew that it was meant to be. If I hadn't died he wouldn't have had you.'"

Dad's head fell forward, his crimson hair falling to curtain his face. I blinked, watching as a single silver tear glided down the cheek closest to me.

"Dad?" I whispered.

He pulled in a shuddering breath, and then raised his head, wiping the tear from his cheek. "I'm okay Kenji. Arigatou, for telling me that. It… was something I think I've needed to hear for a long time."

"Who was Tomoe, Dad? She said that you would tell me when you decided it was right, but I was just wondering…" I trailed off uncertainly.

"She… was my wife, back in the war. She died sometime before it, and she made me realize what I was doing. She forced me to see the value of my own life, for I didn't care whether I lived or died anymore. That realization made me see the value of life in general. It was her influence that caused me to take up the sakabatou, along with my vow." Dad murmured quietly. He smiled at me then. "But let's not speak of this. All that matters now is that everything's going to be okay."

I nodded. "Hai, it will be." I stood, reaching down and offering him a hand.

He took it and stood, stretching his body. "I feel like new, everything seems to be healed." He grinned at me. "I feel like going on a run… or maybe even a spar."

I read his challenge in his voice, answering him with a grin. "Are you saying…"

He laughed slightly. "Let's see just what you learned from Shishou while you were with him learning my sword style. Come on Kenji."

As I followed him out of the room he put an arm around my shoulders. I grinned. "Dad?"

"Yes Kenji?"

"I love you."

He smiled, squeezing my shoulders tightly. "I love you too aisoku."

* * *

End! I hope you have all enjoyed this, and sorry for the delay! 


End file.
